That brand-new Windows computer you got for the holidays should be pristine. After all, you haven't gummed it up yet with software, right?

Leave that to the computer manufacturers who load your new PC with "free" software you don't want. You might call it bloatware, crapware, shovelware, or crudware, since it's basically useless to you. There's a reason for doing it, of course—bloatware offsets the price of super-cheap PCs on retail shelves, even if only by pennies.

I've seldom encountered problems with bloatware when buying PCs directly from a vendor. But getting a PC at retail, it's a whole other world of digital garbage.

For an extreme example, a few years ago, my 75-year-old technophobic father got a new PC to replace his dying Windows system, which he mainly used to print pictures. I couldn't really recommend spending a lot of money to get it fixed. "Just go find an off-the-shelf PC for under $400," I said. "It'll be fine."

Famous last words.

Hardware-wise, the Acer Aspire X model he purchased at Walmart was sufficient. The specs all qualified as an upgrade at the time.

(Credit: PCMag, Walmart)

To sell this PC for $399, however, Acer sold out my parents and wasted hours of my family's lives.

Using TeamViewer remote-control software, I could see that the system was a mess, though all my father had done was install the software for his beloved (but dying) Kodak printer. The desktop was awash with at least 15 icons for needless, worthless crap. Opening up the Uninstall a Program control panel revealed even more. We tried to uninstall the obvious things, but they persisted.

With many of the uninstall routines, the dialog boxes had giant buttons that would say "Uninstall and Get PC XXXXXX" or something similar. If we just wildly clicked where the button was, the uninstall might work—but something else was installed in its place. We had to look carefully for the fine print on the dialog boxes that read "Delete Only" or similar. Tricks and traps abounded.

Back then, I turned to Slim Computer from Slimware Utilities, which kept a database of bloatware and helped identify it on a new Windows PC. It has since been discontinued, as was the excellently named PC Decrapifier. Current options include Bulk Crap Uninstaller, Should I Remove It?, ThisIsWin11, and Windows10Debloater.

(Credit: Reason Cybersecurity)

These utilities point out some bloatware but might not automate removal—in which case you still have to go through the normal uninstall process, which might be filled with tricks and traps to keep your new PC full of bloatware. So you're on your own to an extent. But there are ways around that.

'Potentially Unwanted' Crap

Dad's then-new Acer PC also came with actual malware, in the guise of "potentially unwanted programs," or PUPs.

The programs don't call themselves that; it's a term used by anti-malware companies such as MalwareBytes. It describes software you probably didn't install on purpose, that you don't want, and that you'll likely find unusable. But it's necessary to say "potentially," because it's possible you really wanted to install a toolbar for your browser called "Search Protect" from a company named Conduit or a search engine for your browser called Binkiland.

In reality, that's about as likely as wanting to be set on fire. Both of those "programs," among others, were on Dad's PC. They existed only to take over his browsing experience; each appears on a list of browser hijackers from Wikipedia. Check the list, and delete any you see. The list can and will go on and on, as hijackers make new threats. It's telling that search results for for "Search Protect" and "Binkiland" and their ilk bring up absolutely no link for people to download those programs—only to methods for removing them.

These programs did a number on my dad's PC. I couldn't get the installed browsers to go to a website to download new tools to deal with those threats. I had to download the clean-up software to my computer, then used TeamViewer to perform a remote file transfer of the EXE installer to Dad's desktop.

Also note that at this point, we uninstalled McAfee Security Suite, which came free with the Acer as well. You may not consider antivirus software to be bloatware, but it certainly can be. Acer didn't put it on there to be altruistic; McAfee paid for placement. McAfee would eventually cost $79 after the trial was over. No, thanks.

Here are a few tools you can use to eliminate hijacking PUPs:

MalwareBytes

I ran each of these tools multiple times, MalwareBytes in particular. It kept finding instances of PUPs, so we turned to the internet (which we could finally surf again) to find instructions for manually deleting individual PUP files. Which we did, with glee. After cleanups were run, the system wasn't totally bug-free. But it was certainly cleaner than it had been hours before.

Don't Do What We Did

Let me make it clear: I do NOT recommend going through the steps above.

If we bought that computer today, it would come with Windows 11. It makes it easy to see what's installed in the Start Menu, right-click things you don't want, and select Uninstall. (If it's just a link to an installer, you should be able to select Delete.)

But you can also go nuclear on bloatware. Start with a full reset of the OS using the Windows 11 Reset Tool. It's the first thing anyone buying a new PC at retail should do after they take it out of the box. This should set the PC back to a pristine state, without bloatware (except the Microsoft-supplied stuff you may not want).

If you do a full install of Windows 11, one known "bug" that prevents any bloatware install is to select "English (World)" or "English (Europe)" as your language of choice--and the install is clean (but still with Microsoft stuff). Change to "English (US)" after the install.

(Credit: PCMag/Microsoft)

Better yet, vote against bloatware with your wallet. Buy a PC from a maker that guarantees a clean Windows install or at least offers the option. Microsoft, naturally, has a clean version of Windows on its Surface devices.

Again, that's clean as defined by Microsoft—you may not want OneNote or Microsoft's Mail app or even the Edge browser. But it's a lot easier to get rid of Windows add-on software than other bloatware with the uninstall-from-the-Start-Menu option.

Custom-built PC manufacturers may offer a bloatware-free installation of Windows; in the past Maingear, Falcon Northwest, and Velocity Micro did. Or go with a local reseller. Or, buy a Mac or a Chromebook and avoid Windows altogether. Or to save money, install Linux on your old PC. (That wasn't really an option for my dad.)

If you're wedded to using an older version of Windows, the only surefire way to get the same result is to reinstall the OS completely with a totally fresh, clean configuration. That's not possible with most retail PCs that came with Windows 7, 8, or 8.1. Whether the operating system installer is an image on a partition of the hard drive or comes on a USB flash drive, it's likely going to install Windows with all the bloatware, fresh as an outhouse, as well.

You can also find the option to download ISO files of Windows 7, 8.1, 10, and 11 at the Microsoft Software Recovery site. You'll need to verify a 25-character product key from a retail version of Windows to download and fully activate the operating system. Keys from computer makers—called OEMs, or original equipment manufacturers—won't work.

(Credit: PCMag/Microsoft)

Why Is This Happening?

You might be wondering why big-name PC makers and software developers are loading all this bloatware with extra "internet wrapper" PUPs on new systems. The answer? Money, of course. As PC sales dwindle, so do software purchases, and companies scramble to make up for their losses.

For more details, read this article by How-To Geek. It examined programs from every major download site, including CNET's Downloads.com, Tucows, FileHippo, Softpedia, Snapfiles, and more. Every site bundled crapware into the desired software. Some of those sites have multiple download "buttons," some of which are actually ads, on every page, to obfuscate and confuse users into downloading the wrong thing. That story is from pre-COVID 2019, but it's unlikely anything has changed. PC sales went up a bit during the pandemic but are back in freefall.

Always download software from the original developer's site—if you can find it. Unfortunately, even Google search results tend to default to download sites such as those listed above.

Years ago, pundit Ed Bott called for a PC "Truth in Labeling Act" to force PC manufacturers to tell users everything that is pre-installed. This is an excellent idea that will never happen. It would also be great if download sites, some of which claim they don't allow any type of malware, would do the same.