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AI has weaseled its way into many aspects of daily life, and romantic relationships are no exception.
But society hasn't quite figured out how tools like ChatGPT factor into matters of the heart, leading one frustrated partner to ask Reddit for advice. He says his girlfriend won't stop consulting ChatGPT for backup during their arguments, and wants her to stop.
"Each time we argue, my girlfriend will go away and discuss the argument with ChatGPT, even doing so in the same room sometimes," he says. "Whenever she does this, she’ll then come back with a well-constructed argument breaking down everything I said or did during our argument."
(Credit: Reddit)The 25-year-old user, who did not post his real name, posted his dilemma on a subreddit titled "Am I The Asshole (AITAH)," prompting a discussion about whether the problem lies in the relationship or the technology.
"While I disagree with [her] use of ChatGPT, have you considered maybe that she has a hard time communicating and is using it to assist her?" says one commenter. "You might want to come up with same ways to communicate more effectively so she doesn't feel she needs the assistance of ChatGPT."
The poster says he feels "ambushed with thoughts and opinions from a robot," and worries ChatGPT could be offering one-sided advice based on the prompts his girlfriend asks it. Some commenters agreed the technology can be biased or designed to reinforce the opinion of the question-asker, though that could likely be remedied by including in the prompt a request for ChatGPT to speak to both sides of the issue.
Others have found AI helpful in understanding their relationships and communicating more effectively. "It was actually incredibly insightful," says one Redditor who entered an argument with his wife into ChatGPT. "It explained that the issue seems to stem from a fundamental difference in the way my wife and I make decisions. Now we know why we're arguing."
Therapists have differing opinions on the evolving role of AI in mental health. "An AI therapist is not equivalent to a human therapist," says Ben Caldwell, a licensed family and marriage therapist in California. "Being present with another person, accepting them as they are, and relating to them from an outside perspective, is healing in ways that machines, no matter how sophisticated, will never be able to duplicate."
Caldwell admits AI-based therapy has advantages of being cheaper, or even free, without needing to make an appointment. That could be why businesses are cropping up to provide AI couples therapy, such as Maia, a Y Combinator-backed mobile app.
Personality-based AI companions, such as the Nomi.ai app, take it a step further, seeking to replace or augment human relationships. "Whether you’re looking for an AI friend, girlfriend, boyfriend, fantasy partner, or someone else, Nomi is ready!" says the company website. However, Nomi founder Alex Cardinell tells PCMag he has spoken with users who see their so-called "Nomi" as "filling a gap where there is no human" in their lives, and that some have gone to therapy after being encouraged by their Nomi.